How vulnerability can bring us closer
“We put enormous effort into hiding our vulnerability, but it’s our vulnerability that truly heals. When we feel safe enough to expose our shadows, that’s when we become free.” Gabby Bernstein
It can be scary. Allowing others to see the unvarnished, raw version of ourselves – especially the people who we aren’t very close to. It can be even scarier to share skeletons in our closet, or maybe our outrageous life stories or imperfect lives. I tend to be a private person and historically have kept my personal life to myself; a safe haven from the judgement I’d be a victim of if I exposed myself. Superficial shallow talk with acquaintances seemed natural, but it was also boring. And I realized that I was missing an opportunity to really connect on a deeper level where true connections are made.
I also accepted my shocking past as a part of my magic.
Sitting in circle with women has given me courage. When we sit together and share from our hearts, we realize that we all have shocking pasts. We’ve all had trauma or some unpleasant experiences that perhaps we’re ashamed of or would prefer not to share. When we speak these truths, they are received with open and loving hearts. Not with judgement or decree. And we’re pulled closer together in sacred connection.
When I was a young girl, my birth mother baptized my brother and me Baptist. Both my mother and father were Jewish, but after the divorce, my mom lost her Judaism (and quite honestly, herself) and decided that we were going to be Baptist. Meanwhile, my father married a Catholic woman who decided we were going to go to Catholic church on Sunday’s. Later in life, my mother became a Jehovah’s Witness, and we went to the Kingdom Hall, all while celebrating the Jewish holidays with my father. When it came to religion, we were dragged through the murky mud and I was never really sure what to truly believe. Ask me now and I’ll tell you LOVE is my religion :)
I don’t typically share much about my religious background because I always assumed I’d be judged for the outrageousness of my mixed family beliefs. But it isn’t until we realize that things don’t happen to us, they happen for us, and we become magical beings as a result of our incongruous history.
Have you watched a series on Netflix called Manifest? The world around them is literally falling to pieces because they are keeping secrets, not holding true to their integrity, and not supporting each other. When they expose their shadows, they are freed from the turmoil.
Brene Brown said that “Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity. It is the source of hope, empathy, accountability, and authenticity.”
I too believe that vulnerability is the source of hope and empathy, I have not only been witness to it, but I have been a beneficiary of it.
It’s time for us all to expose our shadows so we can be free.
